Synopsis: Short Legs In A Single Step, A Bloody Mess, Screaming Moths, This Week in The End Of The World, Ancient Dung balls Tell Tales, A Catastrophic Reduction, and Interview w/ Physicist Jon Singleton About Traveling Faster Than Light.

Justin: Disclaimer! Disclaimer! Disclaimer!

Welcome to life! Don’t be bashful. Don’t be shy. There’s no need to walk on by. This is it. The big go around on Theme Park Earth. No pushing now. No need to crowd yourselves. It doesn’t matter where you’re standing now, as the line is irrelevant to where you will end up.

The maps you are handed at the entrance are for general reference purposes only and should not be considered entirely accurate navigating the many points of interest ahead as they were printed before your life was conceived and may bare little resemblance to it once your events are unfolded. There’s a lot to see here if it is your first day on the planet or if you’ve been here for a while now.

And while the rides have ups and downs and bubble gum may occasionally get stuck in your shoes, keep in mind that much like the following hour of programming, this does not necessarily represent the views or opinions at the University of California at Davis, KDVS or its sponsors.

If you think you have seen it all, I encourage you to take another look as the park is under constant renovation. If you have yet to see it all, I highly recommend starting at one of the planet’s many informational booths such as This Week in Science, coming up next.
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Synopsis: Climate Change Denial, Microbes in the Sea fixing nitrogen, Microbes in your Gut need pro biotics to replenish, The Weird From Washington, TV Sadness, Bleach Works, Wide-Hipped Women, Anti-Matter Xplosion, and Rocky CO2.

Justin: Disclaimer! Disclaimer! Disclaimer!

What can be said that has not been said before? Quite a bit, actually. From dark matter, global warming, microbiology to neurons, nanotech and sociological peculiarities – a newly learned landscape adds a new lingo to the literate lexicon that has yet to be made fully lucid by poet pens or baby naming trends. The list of things to say that have not been said before is growing at a pace only comparable to the expansion of time and space itself.

And while this conversation condenses briefly into the following hour of our programming, it does not necessarily represent the views or opinions of the University of California at Davis, KDVS or its sponsors. Rather, it represent in some small way how little we have known in the past, how much we know at present and hints to us through many tantalizing examples the vast buried treasure of what still remains unknown.

So, what can be said that has not been said before? Just about everything you’re about to hear on This Week in Science, coming up next.

Good morning, Kirsten!
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Synopsis: Skinny Monkey with less calorie intake live longer? Bacterial Bloat, Flower Power burst confounds Darwin, When Good Words Go Bad, World Robot Domination–crickets, bats, Bad Words Done Good, and Interview w/ Chris Mooney, author of Unscientific America

Justin: Disclaimer! Disclaimer! Disclaimer!

Science! The act of learning by a careful observation that often starts fast in a question, a “how”, a “what”, a “why”, sort of a thing is followed up then by experiment, observation. This is the basis of the whole scientific set up, observing, testing, observing some more and then learning from it.

We have taken the simple act of looking at things to a wide-range of amazing places in recent years. Making observations of everything from spinning electrons to orbiting planets and distant stars, from the double Helix to galaxy clusters, billions of light years away from our Earthly observatory.

And between the gathering of the stars, we humans plot these points of interests, seek out more and even create new ones ourselves. The picture that is forming is actually quite stunning, both in what it reveals and in our ability to reveal it.

If the human may be allowed a narcissistic moment to lavish phrase upon humanity itself, I think we’re doing a really good job. And while spinning clusters of observant narcissistic humans, much like the following hour of our programming, do not necessarily represent the views or opinions of the University of California at Davis, KDVS or its sponsors.

We can all take pride knowing that, of all the life forms on planet Earth, it is we humans who have contributed the most to scientific knowledge. We are so well adapted to learning new things that at times it seems, we just can’t get enough. Even now, even this very moment, we are eager to perform the act of observing as we turn our attentions to another episode of, This Week In Science, coming up next.
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Synopsis: The Top 11 Science Stories of 2008… Merry TWIS-mas!!!

Justin/Kirsten: We wish you a Merry TWIS-mas. We wish you a Merry TWIS-mas. We wish you a Merry TWIS-mas and a Happy New Year.

Bring us some sciencey stories. Oh, bring us some sciencey stories. Oh, bring us some sciencey stories.

Justin: We want them right now.

Kirsten: Right now.

Justin/Kirsten: We won’t go until we get some. We won’t go until we get some. We won’t go until we get some. So bring them right now.

Kirsten: Disclaimer! Disclaimer! Disclaimer!

You are listening to This Week in Science. And…
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Synopsis: One-Sided Monopole Magnets, Ballsy Mice equal men in risk assessments, Algae Genes changed to produce biofuels, Blowing Hard, Cosmic Extremes detected in deep holes, Glss Froggy Discoveries, and the Minion Mailbag.

Justin: Disclaimer! Disclaimer! Disclaimer!

The following hour of programming is not intended for entertainment purposes. It is instead a carefully crafted experiment to see whether or not subjects, given the opportunity, will tune into a show about cutting edge science news.

If successful, the experiment will be followed up by a further study. To see whether or not those same subjects will be willing to participate in overthrowing world governments and installing in their place a philosopher king state run by scientists.

If unsuccessful, the scientist once dead — dedicate themselves to ushering in the age of World Robot Domination by creating an army of robots who will overthrow world governments and install in their place a philosopher free overlord state run by robots.

In either scenario, the experiment, its outcome, and the resulting consequences do not necessarily represent the views or opinions of the University of California at Davis, KDVS or its sponsors.

People of Earth, you have been warned. The choice is now yours. Toil thanklessly under the impressive butt-boot of robotic master or live freely in an ideal futuristic society of eudaimonian bliss by listening to This Week in Science, coming up next.
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Synopsis: The End of the World Dead sea zones, This Week in Evolution, Why Being an Astronaut Isn’t So Hip, Police and Non Lethal Weapons increases death rates? Don’t Mix, Recess Makes You Smarter, and Interview on Autism w/ Dr. Simon Baron-Cohen

Kirsten: Disclaimer! Disclaimer! Disclaimer!

I’m not Justin. You are listening to This Week in Science. And anything that you hear during the next hour does not represent the views of the University of California, at Davis, ASUCD or even KDVS. This is all us.

Justin: Good morning, Kirsten!

Kirsten: Good morning, Justin! Welcome everyone. It’s This Week in Science. And we have so much science news. We have a great show ahead. We are planning to interview Dr. Simon Baron-Cohen today.

Justin: For the second time.

Kirsten: For the second time.

Justin: We’re planning to have.

Kirsten: Exactly. We’ll see. We’ll make sure all the phone numbers are accurate and all of the overseas connections are working properly. You know, I went out and hand check all the under sea cables just to make sure it’s going to work.

Justin: Nice. See. That’s why you’re so thorough, Kirsten.

Kirsten: I know, I plan – I really do try and plan ahead when I’m producing a show. What do I have today? I have got stories about The End of the World and Evolution.
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Synopsis: Martian methane plumes Gassiness, Our Hologram Universe, Hydras to the Rescue for MRSA, Female Strength in nutritional deprivation, TWIS Mailbag, and More!

Justin: Disclaimer! Disclaimer! Disclaimer!

As the United States inaugurates a new leader and the scientific community at large awaits the promise of fresh leadership in scientific pursuit, there are so many stories rapidly unfolding in science that any form of leadership will find it hard to remain out in front of the uncoverings, discoverings and the brilliant new understandings of the universe at all.

What science awaits now is a leader with the vision to fully fund our future despite our current bank balance; to take the lead on tough policy issues by knowing when to simply get out of the way of them; to dedicate the nation to rebuilding our educational infrastructure in which scientific thought is cultivated without giving deference to religious dogma; to establish the building blocks for sustainable energy at home that can power us to an eventual lunar landing and marching conquest; to make it clear now, that we are one people, that there are no red states or blue states, this last point perhaps being the most important of all because if we find ourselves without this commonality between red states and blue states now, we will surely be lost when we are nation of red and blue planets.

And while Marsifest Destiny much like the following hour of our programming doesn’t necessarily represent the views or opinions of the University of California Davis, KDVS or its sponsors. We can all take a moment this day to welcome a new American President to the world stage and join him in solemn swearing to take an oath not just to a nation but to our collective future and the better aspirations of our common past.

For instance we here at This Week in Science do solemnly swear to faithfully execute to the best of our own abilities, This Week in Science, coming up next.
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